Mission:Absolutely,Totally,Insanely Impossible
Before Interval:Agent Blunt(Tom Cruise) is depressed since Scarlett Johansson has just turned down his persistent offer to take up scientology. Oprah is playing reruns of how Cruise has managed to make a fool of himself in front of the whole world by jumpin on a sofa like a crazy puppy. This proves to be the last straw for him and he dies of a broken heart.
After Interval:Two pigeons fly into a shady room and immediatly drop dead shocked by the resurrected Agent Blunt's newest hairstyle. Yes. Agent Blunt is back...only now in the body of Whoopi Goldberg(she badly needed this role).Mission Absolutely Impossible now is to spread the message of Scientology to the whole world and rid the world of the scum who won't embrace it.He/she will also put an end to the assorted horrors of humanity(first on the list being the Oprah Winfrey Show).The movie ends in a breathtaking action sequence in which Whoopi leaps up on a sofa and kicks the living daylights out of Oprah,all the while screaming that he/she was doing it for Katie. Criuse lets out a satisfied smirk..."Should have used Whoopi's body long ago...this'll show that prick Keanu Reaves...he isn't the only one who can manage that wire-fu shit....and any way Carrie Ann Moss did it way better than him".
The rest of the movie is interspersed with unnecessary explosions and a lot of shouting and screaming that ultimately amount to nothing more than the basic jist explained above.[And we blame Sunny Deol for what he does in his movies.]
The above is an amateur attempt, by a friend(Abheek) and me, to provide an alternate approach to what Mission Impossible 3 aims to achieve...profits. At least in one respect MI3 scores a prefect 10...the name...it is practically going to be a Mission Impossible to get profits out of this script. Even an Oscar winning Phillip Seymour Hoffman cannot salvage the movie because I am pretty sure Tom Cruise(who seems to be running with all his might towards a Razzie)will do his part to balance out the odds.I mean, the only thing at the moment that can be worse than a Mission Impossible would be another of Schwarzennegger's "clone" movies in which every second actor is an Arnie clone...talk about cost effective film making.The next week is going to prove if i have to eat my words but i'm banking on Cruise to not let me down...People who've already had the dual misfortune of watching the movie and reading this blog are requested to further their misery by leaving their comments here.
[PS:Inspiration for this post was drawn from the greatbong's blogspot and Tom Cruise's pathetic histrionic abilities]
After Interval:Two pigeons fly into a shady room and immediatly drop dead shocked by the resurrected Agent Blunt's newest hairstyle. Yes. Agent Blunt is back...only now in the body of Whoopi Goldberg(she badly needed this role).Mission Absolutely Impossible now is to spread the message of Scientology to the whole world and rid the world of the scum who won't embrace it.He/she will also put an end to the assorted horrors of humanity(first on the list being the Oprah Winfrey Show).The movie ends in a breathtaking action sequence in which Whoopi leaps up on a sofa and kicks the living daylights out of Oprah,all the while screaming that he/she was doing it for Katie. Criuse lets out a satisfied smirk..."Should have used Whoopi's body long ago...this'll show that prick Keanu Reaves...he isn't the only one who can manage that wire-fu shit....and any way Carrie Ann Moss did it way better than him".
The rest of the movie is interspersed with unnecessary explosions and a lot of shouting and screaming that ultimately amount to nothing more than the basic jist explained above.[And we blame Sunny Deol for what he does in his movies.]
The above is an amateur attempt, by a friend(Abheek) and me, to provide an alternate approach to what Mission Impossible 3 aims to achieve...profits. At least in one respect MI3 scores a prefect 10...the name...it is practically going to be a Mission Impossible to get profits out of this script. Even an Oscar winning Phillip Seymour Hoffman cannot salvage the movie because I am pretty sure Tom Cruise(who seems to be running with all his might towards a Razzie)will do his part to balance out the odds.I mean, the only thing at the moment that can be worse than a Mission Impossible would be another of Schwarzennegger's "clone" movies in which every second actor is an Arnie clone...talk about cost effective film making.The next week is going to prove if i have to eat my words but i'm banking on Cruise to not let me down...People who've already had the dual misfortune of watching the movie and reading this blog are requested to further their misery by leaving their comments here.
[PS:Inspiration for this post was drawn from the greatbong's blogspot and Tom Cruise's pathetic histrionic abilities]
posted by Comfortably Dumb at 1:04 PM
3 Comments:
Wouldn't miss it for the world...and anyway as they say,"Non Sufficio Orbis" but that's a different story and a different post...
All we need now is some cloned babies and a flying Steven Seagal! Steven Seagal flying in his bird-like style and breaking the wrists and neck's of every1 involved!!
fantastic movie...thankfully didn't watch it...
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